Carcass
non-local
"Symphonies of Sickness" & "Reek of Putrefaction"
Okay, I admit that I bought these two slick Earache CD re-releases out of pure nostalgia for my old LPs, which I sold to pay rent back in '95. These are the 2nd & 3rd fastest CDs that I currently own, & they don't get much play these days, but I like having them around.

"

Cathedral
non-local
"VIIth Coming"
For some reason, even though Cathedral's been around for a long time, I'd never really heard much of them until lately. So, maybe I should be writing something like "This CD sucks compared to their old stuff," but instead I'm writing "This CD fucking rocks, and has some pretty surprising hooks." It's less "Sabbathy" than some other Cathedral tunes I've heard, but very good none-the-less.

"

NEW!
Cavity
non-local
"Miscellaneous Recollections '92 - '97"
&
"Super Collider"
Where the fuck have I been living? Under a rock? These guys have been around since '92 & I'm just getting into them now? I'm an indiot, & so are you if you're not familliar with the awesomeness of Cavity. Think Weedeater meets Electric Wizard meets a cosmic force in outer space with the potential to destroy all of humanity with it's evil power to consume worlds (Galactus, for example). That's how awesome these guys are. Plus, I'll give them extra credit for the very cool artwork on the "Miscellaneous" CD.

"

Paul Chain
non-local
"Cosmic Wind"
Paul Chain calls himself "The Improvisor" & explains on his CD jacket that all of the music is produced spontaneously, and the language he is "singing" is entirely made-up on the spot. Apart from this being a pretty cool & weird gimic, the music is really great too. This disc is one long, spaced -out journey through a mellow universe of fluffy gas giants, candy coated comets, and psychedelic swirling star clusters.

"

click on the pics to see larger versions! > The Chicago Rock Music Scene is like an onion blossom: The more layers you peel off, the more yummy deep fried goodness you find. On December 18th, 2003 ChicagoStonerRock.com peeled off all the layers, and presented a free live show at The Note, that deep fried the brains and ear-drums of the festive late-night crowd who turned out to get burned-out by the blistering bass / guitar / drums combo called: INDIAN Indian rocks. You may not have heard them yet, or even heard OF them, but if you have been lucky enough to catch one of their few live gigs, you know that when Indian plugs in their awesome equipment, Richter scales all over the world get nervous. When you see Indian, you feel Indian You may even feel a warm sensation running down your leg as the vibrations jiggle the piss out of your bladder. You may not care, however, because you will be transfixed by the un-godly sounds being generated by the three unassuming gentlemen on stage. Ron complains that he "sucks" at bass, but I guess the bass itself must make up for it, because as soon as he touches it, magic things begin to happen. Very loud magic things. The drummer, Brian, is the intellectual of the group, and beats on shit. Dylan plays guitar and chews on microphones. The screeches, growling, and spasmodic ejaculations that come out of this twisted man and his tortured instrument will destroy you. Luckily for us, no one was actually killed by the music, and when the assault was over, we all stood... around... wanting more! As the organizer of the event, I felt-out the vibe of the crowd after the band left the stage, and here's what I was able to determine: a) The people where blown away by INDIAN. b) They wanted them to play longer, possibly forever. c) Girls like to dance, and Boys like it when they do. And yes, it's true, people where drinking,& wanting to drink more, so they did, until 4am in the morning! And since the band was done (in more ways than one), I took over the PA system, as DJ Stooby Helmsdeep, and blasted more loud music from my own travelling collection of nihilistic stoner-drug-metal fun. Hooray!!! Look for INDIAN to have a 7" out soon, and for them to be playing live around Chicago over the next few months. If you like loud, heavy, rock and roll music, do yourself a fucking favor: Go See Indian. Listen to INDIAN MP3s HERE INDIAN was just the first free show that ChicagoStonerRock.com has brought to you live at The Note, the second one being SALT of the EARTH, an awesome heavy stoner doom band from Indiana. -Stu Helm	dancing deamed fun for everyone
	magic bass plays self
	festive crowd awaits aural assault
	ronnie & dylan - photos by wes tabayoyong

Above: The Crowd at The Note, post Indian, looks longingly towards the empty stage.
Below: ROCKSTAR vs PORNSTAR interview with Indian conducted by Leonardo for LAMB magazine.

Chicago's INDIAN:
Ron - Bass
Brian - Drums
Dylan - Guitar (pleads the fifth)

Q: What made you get in to this business?

Brian - I assume you mean the music business. (Although I did serve some time in the porn industry.) I didn't have much choice in the matter. My grandmother signed me up for drum lessons at the age of 4. I kept up lessons till I was 14, and started playing in bands. By the time I was 20, I realized that it'd be a complete waste to stop playing, so I decided to step it up, take it more seriously, and go balls to the walls with the rock. Frankly, I wish I played harmonica. It's so much easier to pack up and move around.

Ron - Got bored of listening to my albums so I bought a drum kit. I sucked, so I bought a bass, and I still suck.

Q: Could you give some pointers on how to practice your art?

B - INDIAN has an interesting way of writing songs. Ronnie and Dylan tend to work well together, you know... without me. They come up with riffs and stuff, work it all out, and then, when they feel that they've got at least, like, a riff and a few changes maybe, then I'll come in and we'll work it through. Everyone has an equal say, but I think it's difficult for both them and me to try to write together, you know, incorporating drums from the beginning. Granted, often times, they've got a rhythm in their heads, and when I show up, I might zero in on a completely different rhythm, but we tend to work it all out nicely.

R - ...that, along with cheap beer and weed.

Q: Any weird stories in a MOTEL?

R - In Vail, CO once, me, my buddy paul, a set of twin sisters and a bottle of V.O.. I don't remember their names.

Q: What does it take to make a good Shemale adult star?

B - A soft face and big dick.

R - The band All the Pretty Horses

Q: If you were a donut. What kind of donut you be? and why?

B - I'd be the donut that you do in a parking lot. Screeching tires, the smell of burning rubber, Judas Priest blairing out of the dashboard of a cheap hand-me-down family car. Like a Buick or a Mercury or something. (honestly, I just like avoiding the obvious)

R - ...I'm driving the buick

Q: Does size matters, and why?

B - Well now. That's a tricky one. Cause, if I say 'no', then you'll automatically think I've got a small pecker. But I say, girth over length.

R - Maybe to her, but what the fuck do I care

Q: Brains or muscles, and why?

B - Like, to eat? Muscles. I like shellfish.

R - Tits and ass.

Q: Who is your hero, and why?

B - I've always hated the hero question. Uh, Rudy Giuliani. Happy? I don't know. I've never had a hero. No one's ever saved my life but myself and my little buddy named Luck. Maybe a few doctors at various ER's around the country, but I couldn't possibly list them all.

R - Hef.

Q: What will you never do, and why?

B - I will never menstruate. Not cause I don't wanna, I just can't, see.

R - Deal with brian's pms

Q: Favorite sex position, and why?

B - I try not to favor any one position. I'd rather try to work them all in somehow throughout the night. If she's got a favorite, great. But I'll be damned if she's riding on top all friggin' night. I need variety. Actually, I need a combination of things: movement, pauses (you know, like game on, game off), role reversal (she's in charge... then she's not), and most importantly, laughter. So many people are afraid to laugh when they're naked. That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard. Look at ourselves, we look like idiots with our fat asses... HA! HA! Now let's fuck!

R - Shit, anything goes.

Q: Playboy or Hustler, and why?

B - Hustler. If I have to go with printed smut, I don't want it to look like a photography text book. I want real smut; with the facial contortions, the objectification, and of course, the Pink. I'm not jerking off to Sears catalogues... not any more.

R - Hustler, the filthier the better.

Q: Most embarrassing moment?

B - Just about everyday.

R - I'm usually too drunk to notice that I'm acting like an ass. I'm sure lots of people are embarrased for me.

Q: Sexier thing you have ever done?

B - You mean hot? or sexy? I don't know about 'sexy', but, one time I did a girl in the butt while she had her head in a garbage can. Does that count for anything?

R - There's nothing sexy about anything I do.

"